the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
