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• (951): View more from California

  Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.

  (951): View more from California

  Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Sex on roller skates

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Floating mattress

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Tie

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• (631): View more from New York

  he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.

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• (518): View more from New York

  I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"

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• (716): View more from New York

  I was doing good, then they gave me free shots

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.

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• (650): View more from California

  its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  He’s older

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?

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