The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
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YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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