babies were throwing up all over the place
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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