My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
