Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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