Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Randomize
