Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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