doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
