Duck Duck Cougar?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
