I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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