Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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