I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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