I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize