Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!