Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize
