Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Sext me about skeletons
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
