That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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