it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
