it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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