The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
try to milk me bitch
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
