We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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