I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
