It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
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