i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
