She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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