the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Randomize
