Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
