it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
