At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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