I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize