So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize