just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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