The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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