im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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