My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
