Will you blow on my dice?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
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