He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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