Dual....:-)
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
