Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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