wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
