Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
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