my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Randomize
