I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
