i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Come see our sink grown plant.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
