Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
He had one of those small greek statue penises
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Randomize
