I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
