im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
