I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
