it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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