Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
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We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
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mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books