I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
